it permeates everything around me.
It is seeping into my pure existence.
It is swallowing me whole.
I can’t keep it out.
It reaches up to the heavens and down inside the earth.
It’s hard to get my breath, it feels like I am being slowly choked.
At times I find myself grasping for air,
wanting to see the clarity that I know can be found.
What is this cloud that surrounds?
I have a headache from it.
I want to escape.
I am not being allowed,
I fight to get out of this cloud,
It keeps me where my feet are rooted,
I can’t move It’s so unfair.
I am bound inside the cloud.
I haven’t felt a cloud like this before.
Holding me down, choking me, bringing up my fears.
What if I can never get out?
Who will see me in this thickness?
I want to find someone who will hold me and melt this cloud,
where are you?
come on hold me tight, lay next to me and wrap me in your warm arms. Don’t let the darkness seep in.
By myself in this thick cloud that is turning into my existence.
It’s dark in here, and I am afraid.
Where is everyone else?
How come I am the only one here?
I can’t seem to find my way out.
The air is so thick and moist. It’s cold too.
I shiver to think this is it for me.
I am holding up a mirror to where I know the sky is,
I want to burn a hole in this cloud, so that the sun may shine again.
I need the rays of sun to warm my body and make me feel that everything is gonna be alright.
I have held up the mirror for hours, it’s not working.
I think I will just curl myself into a ball and lay here.
In the cloud that I have become.